Final Fantasy VI: In Conclusion!

So, Kammy. FF6. FF6 -- They just don't make games like they used to, huh, matty? This? Truth. I feel like we could have probably gone on for a good six months about FF6. We almost did. ;-) Quiet, you. Well, there are many things you can talk about in this game. It's extremely dense. The awesome thing about FF6 to me is that every time I play it, I discover something awesome I didn't know about before. Like the toilet squatting? That was new to me. Yeah, me too. Who knew that during your grand adventure to save the world, you had time to drop the kids off at the pool? Wait, there's a pool? That, dear, would be slang for dropping a deuce. ....Anyhoo!

FYI? Poo jokes? Always funny.

...well, she's awful! Getting the lyrics wrong is also rewarding.

I really think that FF6 is the top of the rollercoaster ride for the series. You go down a little hill and back up with FF7, and then it's the start of the inevitable decline. I wonder why that is? I mean, obviously the game has lower production values, is less technologically advanced, and less polished than its descendents. I think that too much emphasis got put on things like 'graphics' and 'unique game mechanics'. Like, look at all the bugs in this game! This run I got a sketch bug that froze my ATB bars and I had to reset I never actually use Relm, unless I'm Lore whoring, so no sketch bugs for me, although this and the other bugs are usually things that you'll never do, like sketching an invisible confused ally. It was weird, I never got one before. Or it might have been unrelated to sketching. But I think Relm was in my party. Anyhoo. I am shocked you'd never use Relm. Shocked. I think my affection for FF6 and FF7 comes from my affinity for those things which are ambitious and a little unpolished. FF6 does some wacky things. The experiment with non-linearity? Suicide, teen pregnancy, in a video game? An entire sequence where you go to the opera? These are crazy experiments. They're things which would not necessarily be attractive to the audience. Although, I suppose that Japan likes suicide, so maybe I'm off on this one. There's something to that. Six was an epic story, had a lot of great, versatile characters (if you set things up right), but lacked a strong translation for the script which left you scratching your head in confusion. I was surprised at all the 'taboo' cultural things in the game, what with the teen pregnancies and the suicide attempts. But I think those are outshone by things like the opera scene, Cyan's dream. The parts of the game like that are pretty much fully immersive gaming experiences. It's true; the actual cutscenes that don't involve the player are few and far between. The way the opera scene is designed, it forces the player to be involved and on his toes. I remember the first time playing the Opera scene when the game just came out, before the advent of internets and such. I actually had to write out the score, because it seemed important at the time.

I also think, at the time, I named all the characters swear words. Remember that time that we named Terra EsprSx over and over again? "Only EsprSx can bridge the gap between esper and human"? Will you be our hope.... EsprSx? There's so much dialogue in this game, and I think the average player won't see a good third of it. That's what gives this game replay value. I won't replay a game just to get the ultimate weapon or whatever. I WILL replay a game if it means I get a better story. Which is a shame. So many of my favorite scenes (Gau and Father, the Brothers in Figaro, etc.) people won't see because they're not mandatory. Okay, am I a total nerd if I kind of tear up when you go to see Gau's dad? I'm sorry... Yes... But it's a well done scene. It's goofy, and poignant. That's a good summary of FF6 in general, actually. Example: The whole guilt Ultros into letting Relm sketch a picture of him so he'll attack himself and leave, only to have your sketch fail because the hit rate sucks on it? Hilarious. No, seriously, you're right. Goofy, but poignant. Like the opera!

A secret? This scene gets me every time too.

And we shall use this power on Alderaan.... Figaro!

The other story thing that interests me is that this is a very Star Warsy game too, but it doesn't bother us like 2 and 12. Well, in 2, you actually had to go into a death-star like dungeon to rescue the princess. That's true. And 12 smacks of the 'prequels', what with the clone war and the robot fighting. FF6 takes the base elements, small group of rag-tag rebels trying to overthrow the evil Empire and they have the decency to stop short of having Kefka be Terra's father. I think that's why 6 (and 7, but this post isn't about that) is so great. They take all of these really good ideas and mechanics, and they don't overuse them. For example, you only have a small number of multi-party dungeons. If you had twenty of them? Overkill. You have a fair number of mandatory character selections based upon the story, but a lot of the time, you're open ended as to who you want to use. I actually like the bonus dungeon in FF6A, since that makes great use of the multi-party system. It's also hard as balls. Hard as balls? Maybe you should have that looked at. ;-) Zing! Zing indeed.

I mean, I hate to be rabid fanboy about a game, but 6 is probably in the top 3 favorite games of all time. I agree. I think its imperfections are endearing. The limited text space, I think, really keeps the game chugging along. Dialogue in later installments tends to be quite overwrought, and not as quotable. That's true -- I still have issues with the script, like where they edit out the Celes suicide attempt to be an enjoyable theme-park thrill ride, but beyond that, the characters are likable, well-written, and believable. But everyone who plays it KNOWS that she's killing herself. The code for that is so transparent as to not really matter. That's true, but I'm an advocate of calling a spade a spade. So you can't watch I Love Lucy because they can't say the word "pregnant" when she gets knocked up? It's the same sort of thing. I still stand by my Kefka is the greatest villain of all time just due to the fact that he's believable statement. What do you think, K? Greatest villain ever, or confused clown who lost his circus troupe? I love Kefka too. First boss to get an angelic choir backing him up! This, however, becomes overdone eventually.

And it comes after your mom. Zing!

This is like Ultima, but actually effective.

The problem with future FF games is that they go, hey, people loved this in FF6. Let's add it to this game too. Everytime you cast Ultima, a Final Fantasy villain gets his wings. Does anyone actually cast ultima anymore? I mean, I've not used that spell for a long time because there are always mechanics in place that outstrip magic spells. The kids have Waterga instead, nowadays. Ultimaga-Os! Part of a balanced breakfast! I think the problem with newer FFs is overexplanation. They're too neat, if that makes sense. They don't take as many risks, and don't reap as many rewards. That's a good point, I suppose. I think a bit of the opposite, actually -- that the future FFs are just too overcomplicated, if anything. I *still* to this day don't understand the plot of FF7, FF8 was too high-school romance (which no-one really understands)... the list goes on.

Okay, and maybe this is just me here... but when I was a kid, and I had an SNES, I would play things like Zelda and Secret of Mana with my sister and we'd like, make up dialogue between the characters, basically as if we were playing dolls or something and that's something a kid couldn't really do with a newer game. You could with FF8, since all Squall ever says is '...'. I guess. But you don't have the mysteries purposefully left unresolved, like Shadow and Relm. I mean, it's easy enough to figure out, but the game never actually has the tearful family reunion scene, or anything. Yeah, but if you couldn't figure out that they had some sort of family connection... I mean, the fact that they're the only two who can use the memento ring, for one thing. Then again, I'm sure there's a whole group of people who play RPGs and don't read any of the plot. But my point is, the game doesn't overexplain and make it a hallmark moment. That's true. FF6 doesn't try to beat you over the head with 'you must feel sad now!'.

Shadow is a much manlier name than Clyde. And he has backstory in spades!

There's a lot of emotion in this and... ...the following scene.

The line that always gets me is Celes' right before she stabs Kefka on the Floating Continent. "Power only breeds war... I wish I'd never been born." I mean, that says a lot of stuff in one line! Lamely, that line was not kept for the Advance version. There's something lame instead. I'm continually impressed with how well Woolsey did with the script. That line totally outdoes the Advance translation: "Celes: Power only breeds war... It's something we'd all be better without." -- The 6A script is really awful. That's a lot more sterile. I don't know, I don't think the most accurate translation is always the best translation. Though 6A does actually have the suicide scene correctly worded, so I suppose it's six of one... The FF6A script isn't awful, it's just that too often they throw away the baby with the bathwater. I don't know. They went in and changed a lot of things. Future games shouldn't set precedent for past ones, and with all these remakes, that's what happens. They take out a lot of things that made the games great, and put puns and pop culture references in to try and make the script 'funny'. They took away the son of the submariner line, and my favorite Celes line, and the subsequent Kefka "hate" spiel. But there was planty of good, too. I mean, it's a translation by committee. It's not going to have the personality of one done by a single person. I suppose. I still think they butchered it, but maybe I'm getting nostalgic in my golden years. Come on, Matty, you didn't think that when you played it in February! I've played the classic again, and realize how wrong I was. Also? I mainly like it to tweak your nose. Remember how bent out of shape you got with the fan-trans that called him Cefca? That is a level of accuracy that is too retarded for me.

I wish FF games would get back to the trend of renaming characters that have names that sound stupid in English, like "Lulu" or "Fran" Fran is a great name. She was the nanny, you know. It's not a good name for a bunny girl with no sense of humor. Would you rather her be called Snooty McHopsalot? Anyhoo, back to six. It's practically perfect in every way. You've got tons of backstory, a driving and engaging plot, characters that are, for the most part, well-balanced and provide limitless possibilities for future playthroughs... I think I'm ready to score this piece if you are. Let's do it. Alright then. I'm not ashamed to do it. Any negative points in six are far outshined by all the gold. 10/10 for me. I feel loath to give it a perfect score, because it's not perfect. That's true. But nothing is perfect, after all. There are plot holes, there are incredibly bad glitches However, I do not think there will ever be another RPG like it. 10/10. Let me get out my calculator.... that means that FF6 gets a FFNerds score of... 10! The prophecy has been fulfilled. Coming up next, FF7! Welcome to the era of fantastically bad hair. (No - not the 80s.) OMG, I can't wait. Did you know that FF7, if you don't count Mystic Quest, was the first FF I played? I did, indeed. Did you know it was *not* the first FF I played? Yes, I know. Hey, and when I played it, I didn't know anything about anime, so I thought that being able to fight dragons with a machine gun was super original! Machine guns, dragons, motorbikes.... FF7's got it all. Stay tuned, folks, you'll love it.